Hey! Guess what?!
I won!
Okay, before we go nuts with excitement, I must say I won $8.00.
The overall odds of winning are 1:26 and this is Week 39.
But still, I won something, and I am $8.00 richer than I was before.
So what am I going to do with my winnings?
All of my thinking and planning has been if I WON BIG. No thought at all if I Won Small. But do the same principles apply? Do I spend it on candy bars, milk shakes and in a totally selfish way? Or do I make a tiny plan and maybe do something a little helpful?
Four candy bars? Two milkshakes? Three lattes? A new rosebush?
A dozen socks for the homeless? Four tubes of toothpaste? Eight cans of soup? Personal care items for the women’s shelter? Two stuff animals for the emergency room?
Whether it be a large amount or a small, it is the same dilemma: spend it on myself or spend it for others.
I am honest enough to acknowledge if I WON BIG I would spend a lot of the winnings on myself. And I am honest enough to acknowledge that would be before I put into effect any sharing plans.
I am also honest enough to acknowledge that spending it all on others would tempt me to self-righteousness: Oh, look at how unselfish she is. Isn’t she wonderful?
No, I would not be wonderful, I would be sanctimonious.
I don’t want to be self-righteous. And I don’t want to be selfish.
Is a compromise with myself called for? Some of my $8.00 for myself and some for others? One milkshake and two tubes of toothpaste. One candy bar and one stuffed animal. One new plant for my garden and some care items for the shelter.
These ideas are not totally selfish and others than myself would benefit from this win, small though it be. If I would do this with a BIG WIN, should I not do it with a Small Win?
I am perfectly aware that I am puzzling a lot over just $8.00, but a Book of Ancient Wisdom teaches that a person will not make wise use of much if they cannot make wise use of little. So I consider all this puzzling as a search for wisdom.
I want wisdom. Wisdom to treat myself well and wisdom to treat others well also. BIG WIN or Small Win, I want the wisdom.